


In Which the Skull is Loved

by hecksalmonids



Series: Following the Demise of an Ark [2]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, First Kiss, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, akira is not okay guys, but ryuji will be there for him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:54:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23246611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hecksalmonids/pseuds/hecksalmonids
Summary: Ryuji took an enormous risk to release the lifeboat for his friends. But he came out alive, and his friends are so thankful — except for one.
Relationships: Kurusu Akira/Sakamoto Ryuji, Persona 5 Protagonist/Sakamoto Ryuji
Series: Following the Demise of an Ark [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1671445
Comments: 5
Kudos: 169





	In Which the Skull is Loved

**Author's Note:**

> im so bitter. im so bitter im so bitter  
> Fuck You Atlus if you do not make ryuji loved ill do it MYSELF

“H-Hold on… OK? C’mon, I-I… almost… k-kinda died…!”

The tough wood of the telephone pole pressed against Ryuji’s back. There was no escape from the girls surrounding him, and he knew it.

“Uh, you guys are joking… right?”  _ They have to be joking. They have to be… _

His friends closed in, and panic took over. His thoughts began racing with every manner of rebuke toward himself.  _ You shouldn’t have been so tactless. You shouldn’t have returned. They didn’t want you to return. _

He couldn’t look at his friends. He shut his eyes and braced himself for…

Warmth. Security. Four pairs of arms locked around him, as if they’d found a treasure they thought lost.

“Wh-what? Huh?”  _ Is this real? Do they really care this much?  _ He was far too shocked to form a full sentence.

Futaba, Haru and Makoto didn’t seem to fare much better. They held him firmly and silently, tears running down their faces.

Ann, however, was a different story. Her sobs shook her body, and Ryuji could just barely make out her quiet, shaky voice. 

“You’re here, Ryuji… you’re safe…”

He stood, frozen, until they finally let go and his mind jolted back into gear. “You mean, you ain’t gonna beat me up for what I did?”

A small smile grew on Makoto’s face as she dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief. “Ryuji, you saved us all from certain doom. Why would we hurt you?”

“Uh, because I made that joke about your crying faces? Because I made you all think I was dead and I just had to play hero for no r-“

“Ryuji, stop!” Ann had known him for much too long now to not know where this line of thinking would take him if she hadn’t interrupted. “You’re alive, we’re all safe because of you. That’s all that matters.”

“But I-“

“That’s  _ it _ , Ryuji. You’ve been hurt enough. By your dad, by Kamoshida, by shadows. I won’t add my name to that list, ever.” Everyone nodded in agreement.

Ryuji took in the faces of his teammates, his  _ friends _ , around him. Futaba, with her glasses off, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. Makoto, with her small smile continuing to widen. Haru, barely able to conceal her glee. Ann, with a smoldering resolve in her eyes. Yusuke, framing him between his fingers as if he wanted to paint ‘The Boy Who Ran’. Even Morgana, as unreadable as his feline face was, seemed glad to see him alive.

_ Akira…? _

Ryuji saw the boy in the corner, a seemingly warm smile on his face — but he’d known Akira long enough to recognize that expression. The reassuring smile, the one to hide his inner turmoil, the one he always put on to instill a confidence that he didn’t really have in his friends.

The chilly November air seemed to affect Ann. “Sheesh, it’s c-cold! Let’s go to Leblanc before I freeze to the ground.”

“I’m gonna stay behind for a bit, yeah? I’m… a bit too tired to walk.” Ryuji responded with a calculated pause.

He was thankful that Ann was as quick on the uptake as he expected. She followed his gaze to their leader, and her voice softened with understanding. “Yeah, sure. Akira, keep an eye on him, will you?”

That startled Akira, which was definitely out of character. “Uh, yeah. You got it.” He walked over to Ryuji as the others made their way to the train station. “Are you okay?”

With a mischievous look in his eyes, Ryuji dramatically leaned on the telephone pole. “Dude, I’m pooped, I’m about to COLLAPSE, I can’t WALK a STEP without FALLING OVER!”

That got a chuckle out of Akira. “I guess that answers my question. Why did you stay behind, then?”

“‘Cause of you, dude, something’s clearly bothering you. What’s up?”

Trepidation flashed over Akira’s face, so fleeting that Ryuji almost missed it. He covered it up with another of his smiles, with an ease that could only come from experience. “What do you mean? I’m just glad you’re alive.”

“C’mon, man, just spit it out. I told you that I’d help you with anything, didn’t I?”

The glare of the streetlights caught on Akira’s glasses as he looked down, obscuring his eyes and making his expression unreadable. “Why would you do it? Why would you risk your life like that?”

“Wha- the Palace was collapsing, dude! None of us would have made it out otherwise!”

“Yeah, the Palace was collapsing, and you still decided to risk your life!” Ryuji was shocked — he sounded _ angry. _ “You should have told someone else to do it! You should have told me to do it!”

“Dude, keep your voice down!” In a better situation, Ryuji would have appreciated the irony in that statement. “Look, you’re a talented guy, but no one except me could’ve made that sprint. You know that! The hell are you mad at me for?”

All the anger seemed to melt out of Akira’s body in a second, leaving him deflated. “I’m not angry at you.” He took off his glasses.

“I’m supposed to be the one who takes the dangerous risks, take the blows so my friends don’t suffer. I fought the gauntlet in the casino, went through the interrogation room, so no one else would have to get hurt. I spend every single chance I have to build up the strength to face whatever comes, and the one time I couldn’t, you almost _ died,  _ Ryuji. I-I don’t… I can’t…” For the first time since they’d met, Akira’s voice broke. He finally lifted his head, and Ryuji could see the tears trailing down his face. “In the end, I was still too weak. I can’t forgive myself.”

If Ryuji was shocked before, he was flabbergasted now.  _ This _ was how Akira felt? For all these months, he’d been suffering alone, for the sake of his team, and Ryuji hadn’t even thought to check on him.  _ I’ve been an effin’ moron, haven’t I? This is my chance to fix that. _

“Akira, you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.” He didn’t respond, but Ryuji could tell he was listening. He grinned. “Listen to yourself, man! You take every chance you get to grow stronger because you don’t want other people to get hurt. Even with your criminal record and all the other shit in your life, you still helped me, Ann, Makoto, a ton of others! Shido stuck that effin’ record on you for the past eight months, and now you kicked his ass for it! It takes more than a weak person to do that shit.”

Akira looked away again. “But it still wasn’t enough.”

“If it wasn’t enough, we wouldn’t be standing here, and our friends wouldn’t be safe at Leblanc right now. More than that, Shido would still be doing whatever the hell he wants. You’re strong, but you’re not superhuman. You gotta trust your teammates too.”

“I do trust you all-“

“I don’t mean in the Metaverse. There’s a lot more to your life than that, dude. We’ve all dumped our problems on you enough, it’s time we return the favor. Ain’t it?”

That was evidently the last straw for the boy. It was clear that the pain had been building up inside him for far too long, and he pulled Ryuji into a hug as he finally allowed it to release. His sobs were powerful, almost heartbreaking. All

Ryuji could do was return the hug, wrapping his arms firmly around Akira in support. It was his turn to be strong for their leader.

After a few minutes, his sobs subsided. “I really am like Sojiro, huh?”

“Whaddya mean?”

“You’re the one who got caught in a fiery explosion, and I’m the one being comforted.”

“Eh, you’ve clearly had a lot on your mind since the interrogation room. I’m just glad you trusted me enough to let it out.” Their embrace broke. “Besides, I’m alive, you’re alive, all our friends are alive. What’ve I got to complain about?”

Akira grinned, the familiar glint returning to his eyes. “Don’t go expecting me to tell you all my worst secrets now. I gotta keep up my aura of mystery, you know?”

Ryuji snorted. “Oh, shuddup.”

The laughter that emanated from Akira at that comment was music to Ryuji’s ears.  _ Now that Shido’s beaten, we’ll finally get some peace, huh? _ Seeing the other boy so joyful after their ordeals filled him with a blissful, almost giddy energy.

At that moment, Ryuji was thankful for his reckless nature, without which he wouldn’t have leaned in and pressed his lips against Akira’s.

The kiss was a melody of answers, memories, promises. The puzzle of his feelings and the bond he shared with Akira, finally falling into place to form a beauty surpassing the Sayuri. Akira’s lips moving against his, firm and almost hungry, a reminder of the strength and resolve of the Trickster who’d stolen his heart. An assurance that they never had to be apart again, ready to be stronger together and face whatever the world could throw at them.

After what could have been two seconds or two years, they broke apart, leaving Ryuji completely dumbstruck.  _ Did I really just do that? _

Akira, ever the suave one, was quick to find his words. “Wow. That was a long time coming.”

“Did we- Did I actually-“

Akira rolled his eyes. “Yes, you really did kiss me. And yes, I did quite enjoy it. Now, I coooooooould be reading the situation wrong, but from what I’ve seen, this means we’re in a relationship now, does it not?”

_ God, that smirk of his.  _ “I just got caught up in the moment, dammit! This doesn’t mean-“

“Oh, so you didn’t like our kiss, then?” Akira pouted overdramatically.

“I didn’t say that! I ju-“ Ryuji was abruptly cut off by Akira’s lips, effectively shutting down both his voice and his lingering doubts. It felt so serene, so  _ right _ , to be kissing Akira like this. He had no reason to deny anything anymore.

“Alright, fine, you win!” Ryuji pulled away, almost reluctantly. “So we’re dating now, is that it? Is this how I find out I’m gay? How the hell did you even figure it out before I did?”

A wistful smile formed on Akira’s lips. “I could be all cocky and say ‘I know everything about everyone, Sakamoto. Your secrets aren’t safe with me.’ But…” He lowered his eyes. “I didn’t know. Not until now. I couldn’t have any possible idea if you were, no matter how well I got to know you, fell even more in love with you. All I could do was hope for that one-in-a-million chance that you felt the same way.”

_ I always have, Akira. Whether I knew it or not.  _ “Then I’ve got a lot of time to make up for, yeah?”

Akira laughed at that. “You can make up for that another day. Right now, we gotta get back to Leblanc before Sojiro chews my head off.”

“Right, we’ve got a party waiting, don’t we? You wanna lead the way?”

“Hell no.”

Hand in hand, they walked toward the train station, a comfortable silence between them that was only broken by one exchange.

“Did you mean it, Ryuji?”

“Mean what?”

“When you said I was the strongest person you’ve ever met.”

He thought about it. “Well, not more than my ma. But aside from her? Yeah, no question.”

Akira grinned. “I can live with that.”

Together, they made their way into the night.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry about the long wait, i was stuck for a long time on how i wanted to structure this fic  
> Following the Demise of an Ark is a series instead of one work now, because i really wanted the individual stories to have their own spotlights  
> big thanks to nuuneyraegon for being my beta!


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